I found it peculiar because usually he would email/text/call several times throughout the day when we weren’t scheduled to see each other. Intimate communication: dirty talk, phone sex, drunken declarations of love.
But nothing at all before and after the actual rendezvous. Often times I wouldn’t even know where exactly we were meeting. He would not communicate the info until the last possible moment, and then without any emotion or longing that I could tell.
I asked him about this one day when we were scheduled to meet and I hadn’t heard from him.
“Why don’t you ever text or email or phone me around the time we are planning to meet?”
His answer took me aback.
“Look, I emailed you, I texted you and I called you all last week. Isn’t that enough?”
Huh? For real?
“Well,” I responded, “I wasn’t aware we were keeping track and saving up emails and texts and phone calls in a Communications Bank Account.”
And not only deposits could be made in the Communications Bank Account – just as with any regular bank account, withdrawals could be made as well.
For example, if MG was going away on a family vacation that would keep him out of contact for awhile, he would make a communications withdrawal and inundate me with emails and texts and phone calls the week before. That way, he didn’t feel the need to communicate with me when he was with his family – he had withdrawn and spent all communications beforehand and thus felt no obligation towards me.
How ingenious, I thought. What a fucking manipulator. And when I brought it to his attention? He did what he always did when he didn’t want to talk about something – he ignored it.
I think that what was actually happening was that subconsciously he felt guilty about seeing me; I mean, really – how could he not? So he felt the need to distance me prior to and after an assignation.
I couldn’t say it didn’t hurt, even after I figured out what was going on. But it certainly added to the growing list of pros and cons I kept a silent tally of in my brain. Right now, the pros still outnumbered the cons…but the the cons were damn near catching up.